Chad Vader: Day Shift Manager
 It's a little known fact that Darth Vader, the great Jedi warrior-gone-bad, has a younger brother named Chad. For this "less charismatic" family member, the Force doesn't always come through. Though Chad takes pride in his position as day shift manager at a Wisconsin grocery store, the floor staff doesn't respect him, the general manager resists being called Emperor, and the cute check-out clerk isn't interested, sorry. When a customer attempts to return a bag of stale potato chips, Chad hisses, "Yesssssssssss. I feeeeel your anger." When he is demoted to the night shift, he dutifully tackles the necessary chores—"now, the waxing of the floor is complete"—but then gets his cape stuck in the cleaning machine. We won't give anything away, but later episodes show Chad drowning his sorrows in chocolatinis, being visited by an Obi Wan-esque ghost, and getting fired by the real-life mayor of Madison. It's all in a day's work for a sibling of the Sith lord.
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