I Hate Cilantro
Dear  I Hate Cilantro, How dare you impugn my favourite herb with your filthy web site of lies? I've been eating coriander (or "cilantro" as you Yanks call it) all my life, and it's never done me any harm! I love its subtle citrus-tinged flavour, and my wife uses it in all her recipes. But here you are with your damning haikus—have you got nothing better to do? Is it really necessary to publish 12 entire pages of anti-cilantro propaganda and stories? So it tastes like cheap cologne, soap, lemon washing-up liquid, or toxic metal cleaner, eh? I was browsing your 1,100+ members and they all look like ignoramuses. A stint in Her Majesty's Forces would do these lunatics a power of good. As if that wasn't enough, the very fact that you're selling apparel emblazoned with your anti-cilantro moniker is final proof that the world really has gone barmy. Yours herbaciously,
Maj-Gen. Coriander, British Army (in Food and Drink Humor) |
