Distort Your Childhood Memories To Make Yourself Look Cooler
Leap day arrives but once every four years -- what are you going to do with your bonus twenty-four hours? Your extra spin o' the sun dial? Here's a suggestion: take a moment to select several lucid childhood memories, then post them on the communal archive Random Access Memory. For extra fun, try assigning your memories Robert Ludlum titles: The Long Division Conundrum. The Water Fountain Fiasco. The Four Square Conspiracy. The Sally Mansfield Affair. You get the the general idea.
Host a Sweetbread Cook-Off
Why not take this extra day to invite your organ-meat-loving, gout-addled friends over for a friendly and fun cooking contest? A sweetbread is the thymus gland of a lamb or calf; it is prenatally developed and of unknown function, and it makes for some great eating! Not really. But recipes abound -- just check out Chapter XV of the Fanny Farmer Cookbook. Our favorite is the simple-to-prepare Larded Sweetbread -- just parboil, lard, and bake!
Find and Photograph the Ischnura Pumilio
The Ischnura pumilio dragon fly has been found only twice in Finland, and has never been photographed. Not even Sami Karjalainen, the host of Finnish Dragonflies, has been able to capture the elusive insect on film. But photographing the critter is not going to be easy, especially since February is very cold and the likelihood of seeing even the most common dragon fly is almost nil. It's not like you're wasting time -- February 29th isn't even a real day!
Marvel at the Ignorance of Our Ancestors
Instead of looking to history for wisdom and tolerance, why not explore some old-fashioned stupidity? Case in point, The American Eugenics Movement, an early twentieth century effort to breed better human beings that took place right here in the good old U.S. of A. According to this illustrated archive, "Eugenicists effectively lobbied for social legislation to keep racial and ethnic groups separate, to restrict immigration from southern and eastern Europe, and to sterilize people considered 'genetically unfit'." Sadly, the rest is history.
Channel Tom Clancy
It's been on your to-do list since junior high school. Now it's time to bang out that blockbuster spy novel! Here's our recipe for an instant bestseller:
Take an Arts 'N' Crafts Break
This leap year, take a cue from Tom Stefopoulos and his Lovejoy Ramp Murals. Beautify your workplace! No talent? No problem. Just do the best you can. Ideas: Trace the outline of your hand and then sketch in the features of a turkey. Use Popsicle sticks and two colors of yarn to weave a great decorative trivet. Create a fanciful self-portrait using macaroni, construction paper, and paste. Ask your co-worker why she's crying.
Shut Up and Listen
On February 29, get outside and listen to the Pulse of the Planet! There are probably hundreds of cool sounds in your neighborhood that you've never even noticed. For instance, did you know that most elementary school playgrounds are home to large families of chimpanzees? Approach quietly and you'll hear them. Other rare, yet precious sounds include: snow falling on cedars, garbage trucks backing up, and the clanging chimes of doom. Hush now and just open your ears....